A common excuse that I hear from my readers all the time is that they have not been "raised properly". They blame their problems with shyness or their lack of success with women with things such as:
- A domineering mother.
- Bullies / loneness in high school.
- Religious family.
- Other "emotional baggage."
Well...cry me a river, but who cares?
While it is true that most of us are the way we are now because of the way we were brought up (I don’t think anyone could argue against that), it is also true that by the time we’re in our late teens or early twentys, we should be mature enough to make our own decisions.
By the time we move out of the house, we should be in control of our own lives. We should choose what to believe, how to act, and how to adapt to our environments.
I share absolutely no sympathy for people that use their “environment” as an excuse.
Once, a college kid emailed me to complain about how he doesn't have time to date because he has to study, and how he can't study at home because the television is always on. (Which according to him leads to his poor grades which in turn leads to his lack of success with money.)
Okay...let's ignore his "argument" and focus on his complaint about not being able to study at home.
There are kids in third world countries that walk 3 hours a day – barefoot - to go to a little brick dwelling with a leaky rooftop that they call “school”, just so they can learn the alphabets and hopefully become literate one day. This reader lives 20 minutes (as he later told me) from the library and he whines because he doesn’t have a place to study?
Give me a break.This is exactly why I sometimes feel military training should be mandatory for young guys. These young men have been spoiled their whole lives and they don’t even know it.
Back to dating. I don’t care about your childhood problems. I don’t care about your dominant or overprotective mother. I don’t care about your racial background. All I care about is the future. Let the past be. Don’t let it haunt you for the rest of your life, because if you do, you will never become successful as you’ll always be living in the shadows of the past.
Heck, if I had let my own childhood haunt me, I wouldn’t be here helping you.
I’d be hiding in a corner…and I’d still be afraid of girls!
I speak from my heart when I tell you to let go of the past and focus on the future. You can’t change the past, but it’s never too late to change your future!